Changes in Our View of the Opposite Sex
Preached to: Middle School Students
Speaker: Pastor Amanda Hahn
In our continued series on Change, we explored how following Christ should impact the way we view and treat the opposite sex. Middle school is a season of transition—not just physically and emotionally, but also in how students relate to each other. Through fun games and honest discussion, we unpacked the importance of showing respect, avoiding unhealthy stereotypes, and seeing others the way God does.
Key points:
As followers of Christ, our thinking and behavior should reflect His love.
Respecting the opposite sex starts with seeing them as God’s creation, not objects or stereotypes.
Obsessing over someone or seeking attention can lead to unhealthy patterns.
Jesus summed up the greatest commandments as: Love God and love others (Mark 12:30-31).
We’re called to treat others how we want to be treated (Matthew 7:12) and lead with kindness.
Students were challenged to carry this respect into school, friendships, and their daily lives—making our youth group a place where everyone feels seen, valued, and loved.
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STARTER
To kick off the night, students participated in a fun “Guys vs. Girls” trivia game, followed by a hilarious (and slightly gross) pickle juice challenge. These games highlighted the differences between boys and girls in a playful way and set the stage for a deeper conversation on how we view and treat the opposite sex.MESSAGE
The message focused on how, as Christ-followers, our thoughts and behaviors should change—especially in how we treat those of the opposite gender. Using examples and scripture (Mark 12:28-31), students were reminded that the greatest commandments are to love God and love others. Respect is a key part of that love, and how we speak to and treat each other matters.DIG DEEPER
Through a story about three students (Natalie, Peter, and Lucy), the group explored common unhealthy attitudes toward the opposite sex—like obsession, objectification, and seeking attention. The story prompted thoughtful discussion about how these mindsets fall short of God’s desire for how we see and honor others. Verses like Matthew 7:12 and 1 John 4:7 helped reinforce the biblical call to respect and love everyone.APPLICATION
Students were challenged to apply what they learned by showing more respect and kindness to those around them—especially those of the opposite sex. Whether in school, church, or everyday interactions, they were encouraged to reflect Jesus by being thoughtful with their words, avoiding rude behavior, and being the kind of person who makes others feel loved and valued. -
Mark 12:28–31 (NLT)
28 One of the teachers of religious law was standing there listening to the debate. He realized that Jesus had answered well, so he asked, “Of all the commandments, which is the most important?”
29 Jesus replied, “The most important commandment is this: ‘Listen, O Israel! The Lord our God is the one and only Lord.
30 And you must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your mind, and all your strength.’
31 The second is equally important: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ No other commandment is greater than these.”Matthew 7:12 (NLT)
12 “Do to others whatever you would like them to do to you. This is the essence of all that is taught in the law and the prophets.”
1 John 4:7 (NLT)
7 Dear friends, let us continue to love one another, for love comes from God. Anyone who loves is a child of God and knows God.
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Night 1: Respecting the Differences
Main Question: What does it mean to truly respect someone who is different from you—especially the opposite sex?
Follow-up Prompts:Can you think of a time when someone treated you unfairly because you were different?
Why do you think God created people with such unique qualities?
What’s one way we can show more respect to others this week?
Night 2: Love in Action
Main Question: Jesus said the greatest commandments are to love God and love others. What does “loving others” actually look like in our everyday lives?
Follow-up Prompts:What’s the difference between saying we love others and showing it?
Can you think of someone at school or church who might need extra kindness right now?
How can our family model love and respect in the way we talk and treat one another?
Night 3: Healthy Relationships Start Now
Main Question: What makes a friendship or relationship healthy—and what are some warning signs it might be unhealthy?
Follow-up Prompts:What does it mean to “obsess” over someone, and why can that be harmful?
How do we avoid objectifying people or being treated like an object?
How can we set a good example in the way we talk about people—especially those of the opposite sex?
